It Matters
I have a crystal-clear memory from my early childhood. I was sitting on the backyard steps while looking around with utter dread. The next day, I had to attend school. The summer was over, and I was about to lose my freedom that I had enjoyed since birth. How awful!
The drive to preschool was filled with pleading not to go and crying my eyes out. We hugged for a long time, and my mother left. Somebody escorted the sniffling young me to class, where I had no idea what was going on or what to do. The teacher gathered all the kids into a circle and had us sit. Then she launched into an epic speech. “Today, your education begins. From now on, WHAT YOU DO IS IMPORTANT! Pay attention and learn!” This was a very vivid wake-up call, and I distinctly remember thinking, “Wow! This is real. I had better shape up.”
I have only two other preschool memories. One was the teacher inventing “a fun activity” where we washed her car. Of course, the little brat in me could not help it. I opened the gas cap and shoved the running hose in for 30 seconds. I did not get caught, but we never washed another car. (Yes, education is a two-way street.) Another was riding the swing with a toy fire helmet from the television show Emergency! Such great times.
I have another strong memory from the first day of kindergarten. The teacher gathered us in a circle and said something like, “All that preschool nonsense did not matter. From now on, you will be graded and have a REPORT CARD! Straighten up and try hard, or you will go to the PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE.” This scared me straight as a board. Wow! I had better shape up.
This had become such a pattern that I expected the same speech in grade school. And like clockwork, on the first day, the first-grade teacher said something like, “Everything you did before does not matter. From now on, your grades will be in your PERMANENT RECORD! If you fail, you have to REPEAT THE FIRST GRADE!” I had no idea that was possible. Wow! I had better shape up.
Junior High was a significant change because it was the first time I rode a bus, and I switched to a different school district as part of the Magnet program. This was an effort to bring kids from all neighborhoods together. To do so, each school had a specialty, and my junior high school focused on computers.
My mother dropped me off at the bus stop and said goodbye. From that point forward, I was on my own. When I got to school, I did not know anybody, but like before, the Pre-Algebra teacher said something like, “None of that stuff you did before mattered. From now on, your education will shape your entire future. If you fail, YOUR LIFE WILL BE RUINED!” This was far harsher than my previous lecture, and the experience left me terrified. Wow! I had better shape up.
In high school, I had more confidence. I knew a bunch of kids and mostly knew what I wanted to do with my life. Still, on the first day in my first class, the US History teacher said something like, “For the first time, your education is crucial. If you want to succeed, you need top grades. If you fail in high school, you will GO NOWHERE IN LIFE!” Even though I knew this was coming, the speech hit me like a brick. Wow! I had better shape up.
College was a completely new experience, and I did not know a soul. It was all the way across the country and the newness certainly affected my confidence. Plus, I was no longer the smart kid because you had to be smart to attend college. Still, I expected a similar speech and was rewarded with it from the calculus teacher on the first day. “Nobody cares what you did before. Honestly, nobody. That’s life. Study hard, and maybe you’ll graduate. Trust me, half of you will not. And they failed not because of intelligence, but because they completely lacked self-discipline. It’s all up to you. Nobody else. If you don’t study hard, you will be a COLLEGE DROP OUT!” This scared me like a slap in the face. Wow! I had better shape up.
I managed to graduate in five years to get my four-year degree. Yeah, I had some issues. But there was incredible news! I was done with the speeches. I was finally there! I made it!
At my first interview, the hiring manager asked something like, “Where did you work before? Nowhere? So, you do not have any REAL EXPERIENCE! Get back to me after you have at least five years.” Another slap in the face. Wow! I had better find a job.
Eventually, I found a job and met a fantastic woman. Finally, I had checked off all the boxes, so there were no more speeches. I was an adult! Job done! YAY!!!!!!
True to form, I got married, and out of the blue, two days later, my father pulled me aside and said, “Bill, you have real responsibilities for the first time in your life. Make me proud.” Yes, this massively took me down a peg. Wow! I had better shape up.
It turns out that I had not checked off all the boxes. On May 19, 2006, we had a daughter. It was a chaotic, exciting, and utterly terrifying day. (Try watching your wife get an epidural, knowing that any mistake could paralyze her while knowing you are utterly powerless to do anything.)
Fortunately, all went well, and we had a beautiful baby girl. I vividly recall the nurse who was required by state law to show us how to put a child in the properly installed car seat, asking something like, “Is this your first child? No? Look, you need to try a lot harder.” Another vivid wake-up moment. Wow! I had better shape up.
All of these moments asked the same question. When does life begin to matter? Did it ever matter? Sometimes it does not, and here is an example of hard work that should have mattered 200%. During my second job, my company acquired a rival. My task was to integrate their product into our system/product line. This massive effort forced me to understand their product inside out.
One day, without warning, upper management scrapped that product line. Yet, I was fully aware that the original team had spent endless hours developing, manufacturing, and servicing their product. All their documents, notes, drawings, and resulting product were top-notch. Yet, I tossed boxes of handwritten papers, notebooks, computer files, and handcrafted production equipment into the trash. Management did not even feel the documents were important enough to shred. They worked so hard, yet I vividly remember thinking, “Nothing they did mattered.”
Here is the flip side. Growing up, I knew so many kids who got away with everything. I even knew kids who committed serious felonies. We were immortal. Absolutely nothing mattered.
A great example occurred during my freshman year. Two kids (I knew one of them) (Yes, they were under 21) got drunk, and they set five school fires, of which three did severe damage. One was over a million dollars and had the potential to cause death.
The kids were expelled and had to pay a fine to the school. (I recall it was about $10,000) They were not required to pay for the damage, were not charged with a crime, were allowed to transfer to other schools, and kept their credits. Three years later, out of the blue, I was walking to class, and I ran into one of them. He told me he transferred back in, and the administration did not care. He graduated in my class year. Even I was stunned.
Well, for some kids, that has changed. Now, the internet keeps a searchable/detailed record of everything, and cameras are everywhere. It is easy to do an internet search, which means that everything we do (good or bad) matters. Or does it? Have I come full circle?
Will people look at me and say, “Bill. You are finally an adult. Great job!” But what do I have to show for it? Could I have done less and achieved more? My answer is simple. It always mattered. Should all those people have scolded me? No, but it is human nature to feel superior and try to scare kids straight.
In conclusion, everything I did, learned, failed at, and succeeded at molded me into who and what I am. That lifetime of experience has given me the skills and confidence to accomplish what I need to do right now.
And what about this article? The effort provided me with perspective. I improved my writing skills, and a tiny part of that enhanced my potential reader base. This article will remain in the digital heavens for centuries for scholars I cannot even conceive. And no matter what I do or when I die, it will continue to be a positive step. In summary, IT MATTERS!
You’re the best -Bill
July 14, 2021 Updated December 20, 2025
The drive to preschool was filled with pleading not to go and crying my eyes out. We hugged for a long time, and my mother left. Somebody escorted the sniffling young me to class, where I had no idea what was going on or what to do. The teacher gathered all the kids into a circle and had us sit. Then she launched into an epic speech. “Today, your education begins. From now on, WHAT YOU DO IS IMPORTANT! Pay attention and learn!” This was a very vivid wake-up call, and I distinctly remember thinking, “Wow! This is real. I had better shape up.”
I have only two other preschool memories. One was the teacher inventing “a fun activity” where we washed her car. Of course, the little brat in me could not help it. I opened the gas cap and shoved the running hose in for 30 seconds. I did not get caught, but we never washed another car. (Yes, education is a two-way street.) Another was riding the swing with a toy fire helmet from the television show Emergency! Such great times.
I have another strong memory from the first day of kindergarten. The teacher gathered us in a circle and said something like, “All that preschool nonsense did not matter. From now on, you will be graded and have a REPORT CARD! Straighten up and try hard, or you will go to the PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE.” This scared me straight as a board. Wow! I had better shape up.
This had become such a pattern that I expected the same speech in grade school. And like clockwork, on the first day, the first-grade teacher said something like, “Everything you did before does not matter. From now on, your grades will be in your PERMANENT RECORD! If you fail, you have to REPEAT THE FIRST GRADE!” I had no idea that was possible. Wow! I had better shape up.
Junior High was a significant change because it was the first time I rode a bus, and I switched to a different school district as part of the Magnet program. This was an effort to bring kids from all neighborhoods together. To do so, each school had a specialty, and my junior high school focused on computers.
My mother dropped me off at the bus stop and said goodbye. From that point forward, I was on my own. When I got to school, I did not know anybody, but like before, the Pre-Algebra teacher said something like, “None of that stuff you did before mattered. From now on, your education will shape your entire future. If you fail, YOUR LIFE WILL BE RUINED!” This was far harsher than my previous lecture, and the experience left me terrified. Wow! I had better shape up.
In high school, I had more confidence. I knew a bunch of kids and mostly knew what I wanted to do with my life. Still, on the first day in my first class, the US History teacher said something like, “For the first time, your education is crucial. If you want to succeed, you need top grades. If you fail in high school, you will GO NOWHERE IN LIFE!” Even though I knew this was coming, the speech hit me like a brick. Wow! I had better shape up.
College was a completely new experience, and I did not know a soul. It was all the way across the country and the newness certainly affected my confidence. Plus, I was no longer the smart kid because you had to be smart to attend college. Still, I expected a similar speech and was rewarded with it from the calculus teacher on the first day. “Nobody cares what you did before. Honestly, nobody. That’s life. Study hard, and maybe you’ll graduate. Trust me, half of you will not. And they failed not because of intelligence, but because they completely lacked self-discipline. It’s all up to you. Nobody else. If you don’t study hard, you will be a COLLEGE DROP OUT!” This scared me like a slap in the face. Wow! I had better shape up.
I managed to graduate in five years to get my four-year degree. Yeah, I had some issues. But there was incredible news! I was done with the speeches. I was finally there! I made it!
At my first interview, the hiring manager asked something like, “Where did you work before? Nowhere? So, you do not have any REAL EXPERIENCE! Get back to me after you have at least five years.” Another slap in the face. Wow! I had better find a job.
Eventually, I found a job and met a fantastic woman. Finally, I had checked off all the boxes, so there were no more speeches. I was an adult! Job done! YAY!!!!!!
True to form, I got married, and out of the blue, two days later, my father pulled me aside and said, “Bill, you have real responsibilities for the first time in your life. Make me proud.” Yes, this massively took me down a peg. Wow! I had better shape up.
It turns out that I had not checked off all the boxes. On May 19, 2006, we had a daughter. It was a chaotic, exciting, and utterly terrifying day. (Try watching your wife get an epidural, knowing that any mistake could paralyze her while knowing you are utterly powerless to do anything.)
Fortunately, all went well, and we had a beautiful baby girl. I vividly recall the nurse who was required by state law to show us how to put a child in the properly installed car seat, asking something like, “Is this your first child? No? Look, you need to try a lot harder.” Another vivid wake-up moment. Wow! I had better shape up.
All of these moments asked the same question. When does life begin to matter? Did it ever matter? Sometimes it does not, and here is an example of hard work that should have mattered 200%. During my second job, my company acquired a rival. My task was to integrate their product into our system/product line. This massive effort forced me to understand their product inside out.
One day, without warning, upper management scrapped that product line. Yet, I was fully aware that the original team had spent endless hours developing, manufacturing, and servicing their product. All their documents, notes, drawings, and resulting product were top-notch. Yet, I tossed boxes of handwritten papers, notebooks, computer files, and handcrafted production equipment into the trash. Management did not even feel the documents were important enough to shred. They worked so hard, yet I vividly remember thinking, “Nothing they did mattered.”
Here is the flip side. Growing up, I knew so many kids who got away with everything. I even knew kids who committed serious felonies. We were immortal. Absolutely nothing mattered.
A great example occurred during my freshman year. Two kids (I knew one of them) (Yes, they were under 21) got drunk, and they set five school fires, of which three did severe damage. One was over a million dollars and had the potential to cause death.
The kids were expelled and had to pay a fine to the school. (I recall it was about $10,000) They were not required to pay for the damage, were not charged with a crime, were allowed to transfer to other schools, and kept their credits. Three years later, out of the blue, I was walking to class, and I ran into one of them. He told me he transferred back in, and the administration did not care. He graduated in my class year. Even I was stunned.
Well, for some kids, that has changed. Now, the internet keeps a searchable/detailed record of everything, and cameras are everywhere. It is easy to do an internet search, which means that everything we do (good or bad) matters. Or does it? Have I come full circle?
Will people look at me and say, “Bill. You are finally an adult. Great job!” But what do I have to show for it? Could I have done less and achieved more? My answer is simple. It always mattered. Should all those people have scolded me? No, but it is human nature to feel superior and try to scare kids straight.
In conclusion, everything I did, learned, failed at, and succeeded at molded me into who and what I am. That lifetime of experience has given me the skills and confidence to accomplish what I need to do right now.
And what about this article? The effort provided me with perspective. I improved my writing skills, and a tiny part of that enhanced my potential reader base. This article will remain in the digital heavens for centuries for scholars I cannot even conceive. And no matter what I do or when I die, it will continue to be a positive step. In summary, IT MATTERS!
You’re the best -Bill
July 14, 2021 Updated December 20, 2025
