I Don't Want to Be My Character
To develop anything of substance, it is natural and even essential for authors to envision themselves as their characters. This is especially true for determining motivation and dialogue. I am no exception and pretend to be one of these “people” while writing.
Yet this raises a question: do I desire to become one of my creations? Are they a reflection of who I secretly think I should be? My answer is, “No, but I do put a part of myself into all my words.”
This doesn’t make much sense, because my characters span the rainbow. All I need to do is pick the best one and live it up. Who would not want to be more than themselves; wealthier, braver, younger, more attractive, and super-confident.
All true, but the reason I do not want to be one of my characters has nothing to do with their attributes; it is my plots. To explain, let’s consider Luke Skywalker. What an amazing hero! He saved the universe. Good-looking too! Nothing but plusses from what I see.
Yet, his step-parents were murdered, he killed a bunch of people/creatures, he ended up living on a deserted island drinking walrus milk, and don’t even get me started on his father issues. Not only do I not want to be Luke Skywalker, but I am also not sure I would want to be his friend. Seems like he needs a lot of therapy.
My characters are no different. I threw them into epic messes that destroyed their families, morals, and peaceful existence. I even turned one into a selfless serial killer. Yikes!
However, there is a certain charm in becoming an imaginary character. I could even be a woman or an alien. How about starting life over again as a child? The possibilities are only limited by my bonkers mind.
There is another aspect which is particular to my writing style. My philosophy is to have main characters with humble beginnings that are easy to relate to, because readers will be better able to identify with a normal person and therefore enjoy the story more. As a result, it is easy for me to envision myself in the action because I began with someone just like me.
However, there is a flip side: the bigger they are, the harder they fall. Meaning that when I build up a character’s positive traits over a few chapters, and then hit them with a whammy. As a human with life experiences, I certainly know what it feels like when something bad happens.
And that is the thing. I live a normal life. Not too exciting, but I am certainly not a serial killer. How about being caught up in an international spy story? Keep me out of that! One book series follows telepathic characters. Seems nice, but I spent an entire book explaining how awful it is to be in other people’s minds.
We also need to understand that there is a harsh reality to this line of thinking. Pretending to be someone else is destructive. We are who we are. An author must keep this in mind or risk losing the things and people they care about.
How close have I come to truly thinking I am one of my characters? I occasionally daydream about it, but that is about it. I consider this line of thinking to be plot development or mild self-entertainment. Still… Having a billion dollars and living for 500 years like the character in my first book does have great appeal.
You’re the best -Bill
April 27, 2022 Updated August 15, 2026
Yet this raises a question: do I desire to become one of my creations? Are they a reflection of who I secretly think I should be? My answer is, “No, but I do put a part of myself into all my words.”
This doesn’t make much sense, because my characters span the rainbow. All I need to do is pick the best one and live it up. Who would not want to be more than themselves; wealthier, braver, younger, more attractive, and super-confident.
All true, but the reason I do not want to be one of my characters has nothing to do with their attributes; it is my plots. To explain, let’s consider Luke Skywalker. What an amazing hero! He saved the universe. Good-looking too! Nothing but plusses from what I see.
Yet, his step-parents were murdered, he killed a bunch of people/creatures, he ended up living on a deserted island drinking walrus milk, and don’t even get me started on his father issues. Not only do I not want to be Luke Skywalker, but I am also not sure I would want to be his friend. Seems like he needs a lot of therapy.
My characters are no different. I threw them into epic messes that destroyed their families, morals, and peaceful existence. I even turned one into a selfless serial killer. Yikes!
However, there is a certain charm in becoming an imaginary character. I could even be a woman or an alien. How about starting life over again as a child? The possibilities are only limited by my bonkers mind.
There is another aspect which is particular to my writing style. My philosophy is to have main characters with humble beginnings that are easy to relate to, because readers will be better able to identify with a normal person and therefore enjoy the story more. As a result, it is easy for me to envision myself in the action because I began with someone just like me.
However, there is a flip side: the bigger they are, the harder they fall. Meaning that when I build up a character’s positive traits over a few chapters, and then hit them with a whammy. As a human with life experiences, I certainly know what it feels like when something bad happens.
And that is the thing. I live a normal life. Not too exciting, but I am certainly not a serial killer. How about being caught up in an international spy story? Keep me out of that! One book series follows telepathic characters. Seems nice, but I spent an entire book explaining how awful it is to be in other people’s minds.
We also need to understand that there is a harsh reality to this line of thinking. Pretending to be someone else is destructive. We are who we are. An author must keep this in mind or risk losing the things and people they care about.
How close have I come to truly thinking I am one of my characters? I occasionally daydream about it, but that is about it. I consider this line of thinking to be plot development or mild self-entertainment. Still… Having a billion dollars and living for 500 years like the character in my first book does have great appeal.
You’re the best -Bill
April 27, 2022 Updated August 15, 2026
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